There is No
by Celes-Lionheart
Summary: This is a short Song-fic about a young Obi-Wan and another padiwan. Can Jedi's feel love?


AN: This is a one shot that I wrote awhile ago, actually like 3 years ago... but anyway ;; This is a song-fic based on the song "Everything you want" by Vertical Horizon. Please R&R!   
Disclaimer: I do not own StarWars, Obi-Wan, Vertical Horizon or the song "Everything you want" Haha! I do own the plot, and the character Trinity Thron

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The wind blew a simple melody against the midnight blue sky, bring forth the colors of the stars. A lone figure cut a silhouette against the sky. The figure wore a long generous cloak; the wind caught it in its finger, pulling it loose from the wearers form. Suddenly out of nowhere a second figure comes and strikes at the first with a blue glowing sword. The first figure pulled out its own glowing sword, also blue. The two begin to duel, both showing expert moves and defenses. The first figure gained the upper hand quickly, knocking the others saber out of its hand. Female laughter is heard.   
"If you can't hold onto your Saber in a battle with me you're hopeless…" the wind got knocked out of her as the second figure tackled her.  
"It's not all about the art of the saber, you have to remember that our enemies will use anyway that they can to win." He pinned her arms above her hand, a yelp of outrage rises from her. He moved, effectively pinning her body with his own. They both fell silent, their breathing the only sound.  
_**Somewhere there's speaking  
It's already coming in  
Oh and it's rising in the back of your mind  
You couldn't get it  
Unless you were fed it  
And now you're here and your don't know why**  
_"Obi-wan let her up…" a third voice called out. It was a strong commanding voice, gentile, but one that commanded respect.  
"Yes Master…" Obi-wan quickly got up reaching down a hand to help the downed figure up. She hit aside his hand and got up gracefully without any assistance. She picked up her saber and returned it to her belt.  
"Trinity, I believe that Ki will be pleased when he returns, you did wonderfully, I fear someday you may even be better then myself." The young woman bowed gracefully.  
"I fear that you give too high of complements Qui-Gon. I will never be as good as you." She walked over and kicked Obi-Wan's saber to him. "I believe that your Padiwan is in need of further training." The older man laughed.  
"Obi-Wan I fear that she is correct when it comes to that. You do need to learn that mastering all arts of fighting is important, and that does include fighting with your saber." Obi-wan looked at his feet.   
"Yes Master…" He gave Trinity a death glare as she walked by him, back to the school.  
"You're just jealous that I am better then you at something…" she grinned, knowing that it would outrage him, she knew all the buttons to press when it came to him. His face contorted into one of anger.  
"I'm not jealous!"  
"And now you're angry." She said in a calm way, knowing that it would fan the anger even more, as she walked into the doors.  
_**But under skinned knees and the skid marks  
Past the places where you use to learn  
**__  
_Trinity sighed, she missed Ki, it had been along time since she had been without him, even for a short time. He had already been gone for 2 weeks, leaving her in the care of Qui-Gon. It wasn't that she didn't like Qui-Gon, in fact she spent most of her time training along side his Padiwan, Obi-Wan. But it was almost as if she felt…Abandoned. Ki had gone home to his native planet of Cerean to check on his wifes. He had taken her along before, but this time he had wanted to go alone, without her. She walked slowly over to her own room, stopping to watch a group of children having a history lesson. She remembers when she was their age, but it felt like it was eons ago already. She continued walking on. _Does it ever bother the others that they don't get to ever be real children? Real children go to school, and play, and have…Parents. Does it ever bother the others that we don't get to have our own children? She stopped herself. This is foolishness! We all chose what we are now. There can be no regrets when it comes to who we are._ She continued onward. Qui-Gon's voice broke her thoughts.  
"You're lonely Trinity?" His voice was kindly, caressing her with its warmth.  
"No Master, I am fine." She looked at him levelly, her eyes clear and emotionless. He watches her closely.  
"You are becoming a fine Jedi, Trinity. I didn't know that you were such a good duelist. I believe that Master Yoda would like to see your skills someday." Her heart skipped. _Master Yoda? He knows? I have always loved to duel…_she merely nodded in reply.  
"I would like that much Master." He nodded and turned on his heel leaving her alone again. She continued on to her room, her head and heart in turmoil. A voice flittered to her from the past…  
  
A small figure sat down on the ground crying heavily. It was a small female child in Jedi garb, all in drab shades of blues and grays. A larger figure also in Jedi garb, sat down next to her. It was obvious that the elder was of the Cerea race. He lifted her chin and looked into her streaming eyes.  
"Little one, Jedis don't get upset over such small things." Her eyes lit up with anger.  
"This isn't a little thing! He beat me again! In front of Master Yoda! Dueling is the only thing is the only thing that I am good at, and he's better then me!" her pride had been damaged. The tears continued to flow from her eyes freely, soundlessly, almost unnoticed by the girl.  
"So what does it matter that Obi-Wan bested you in this duel?" He picked up her discarded saber. "Winning isn't everything little one." He walked over to her and handed her the saber. "There is no Emotion…" she looked up at him.  
"There is Peace." She replied.  
"There is no Ignorance…" he continued.  
"There is Knowledge." She stood up.  
"There is no Passion…" he started walking toward the school doors.  
"There is Serenity." She followed him, looking down and fixing her saber to her belt.  
"There is no Death…" Ki saw the form of Obi-Wan watching his Padiwan with pain in his eyes.  
"There is the Force." She looked up her eyes locking with the boy.  
_**You howl and listen  
Listen and wait for the  
Echoes of angels who won't return  
**  
_She finally reached her room, repeating over and over again to herself the code of the Jedi. _There is no emotion; there is peace. There is no ignorance; there is knowledge._ She opened the door and flicked on the lights. _There is no passion; there is ser…_her eyes fell on a figure standing alone in the center of her room. In one fluid movement she had her saber out and ready, the figure on the ground her saber posed to kill.  
"Do you really have to best me twice in one day?" the voice was filled with humor.  
"Obi! What are you doing here?" she tried to get up, but his arms went around her, keeping her on him.  
"I know what your feeling Trin."  
_**He's everything you want  
He's everything you need  
He's everything inside of you  
That you wish you could be**  
_She looked away from him. "How could you? You don't know what its like to be alone at all! Qui-Gon has never left you, and he never will. But no I have to have the one trader to everything we stand for as my Master. His family was more important then training me, his Padiwan."  
"Of course I know what its like to be lonely, what do you think I feel like every time you go away?" She looked at him with questions in her eyes. He met her gaze levelly, his eyes filled with determination.  
"You are part of me. You always have been Trin. Ever since the first day we met." She looked away, tears forming in her eyes. "And I know that I'm a part of you. And as long as I am here you can't be alone."  
_**He says all the right things  
At exactly the right time  
**_She rested her head on his shoulder, it felt so right. _There is no Passion; there is Serenity._ She moved her head and looked into his eyes.  
"Everything is ok now, thank you Obi." She stood up and walked to the window, almost as if the moment had never happened.  
_**But he means nothing to you  
And you don't know why  
**_Her gaze was unfocused until the twinkling of the stars grabbed her attention. _They look so beautiful, so peaceful._ She placed he hand on the window, almost as if she could touch them if she tried. _But that's foolishness; touching the stars is not a possibility. It's almost as absurd as finding happiness or love…_ she shook her head._ Why? Why am I thinking of these things now?_ She could hear him behind her, standing up from the floor and dusting himself off.  
"Trin, you know which room is mine. You're always welcome." She didn't respond. He sighed and walked out the door, closing it behind him. Tears filled her eyes and a small sob escaped her. _Why? Who made up these stupid rules? Who decided that feelings and emotions were so wrong? Maybe I don't want this kind of life anymore! Maybe I want to fall in love and get married and have children._ The tears were rolling down her cheeks by now, unchecked and unnoticed by her.  
_**You're waiting for someone  
To put you together**  
_  
Time passed, she wasn't sure how long, but in that time she had made up her mind. Trinity walked toward the door and opened it, not even bothering to lock it as she left. Her foot steps were soft but swift, not that it mattered, the hour was late and few would be awake. Her steps slowed as she reached a door. It was like all the others, simple metal, telling nothing about the occupant. She rasied her had to knock but hesitated. _Maybe this is a mistake…_She lowered her hand and instead reached for a panel which she open using the force. Typing in a code the door opened. The room was very dark, the only light coming from the stars outside. She could just make out his figure sleeping in bed. _It's now or never…_ She walked to the bed and sat down next to him.  
"Obi, wake up." Obi-Wan moaned softly and rolled toward her. "Come on Obi, I need to talk to you." He moaned again but this time opened one eye.  
"Trin? Why are you here so late?" his voice husky with sleep. "What's wrong?" he moved over allowing room for her to move over off the edge of the bed.  
"You don't mind?" Shock was clear on her features. "I mean it is really late…"  
_**You're waiting for someone to push you away  
There's always another wound to discover**  
_"Anyway time is fine and you know it. Now talk." He pushed her down against the pillows.  
"It's just that…" he placed a finger over her lips stopping her from continuing.  
"You're right, it is late." He reached down and started taking off her boots.  
"What do you think your doing?" she protested in outrage.  
"Taking off your boots so that you can sleep." He pulled the blanket over her. She turned so that her back was to him. "Good night Trin."  
_**There's always something more you wish he'd say  
**_She was starting to fall asleep, rolling over she looked at him and smiled. "I care about you Obi…"  
He opened his eyes and smiled. "I know, I care about you too Trin. Now go to sleep."  
_**He's everything you want  
He's everything you need  
He's everything inside of you  
That you wish you could be  
**__**He says all the right things  
At exactly the right time  
**There is no Passion; there is Serenity.  
**But he means nothing to you  
And you don't know why**  
_  
A few weeks passed, nether talking about that night. Obi-Wan and Trinity were sitting under a tree with books opened all around them. Qui-Gon was standing infront of them, pacing a bit while talking. Trinity was quickly jotting down notes while he spoke. Trinity looked over at Obi-Wan who was staring off into the afternoon sky. She looked back down at her writings.  
"You're not going to learn anything that way Obi." She continued writing. He looked over at her ready to snap back, but then smiled.  
"I was just thinking I guess." Qui-Gon looked over at the two and shook his head.  
"You're right Obi-Wan, we have been at this for a few hours now; you two deserve a break." He turned and walked off toward the school. Trinity watched his retreating form, a question on her lips.  
"Trin, just understand that he is right." She looked back down at her notepad and started jotting down more notes. He reached over and grasped both of her hands in his own. She looked up at him about to speak.  
"Don't. Don't say a word Trin, I wanted to talk to you about something you said." She pulled away from him.  
"Whatever I said wasn't important, trust me." She stood up. "My legs are starting to cramp up…"  
"Then we can walk over and get a bite to eat." He stood up as well, letting the books that were on this lap fall to the ground.  
"No, I'd rather go alone, I'd rather be alone." She started walking.  
"But I don't want to be alone." She could hear his footsteps behind her.  
"Get use to being alone, to be a Jedi is to be alone." The footsteps stopped.  
"Do you really believe that Trinity Thorn?" She stopped dead in her tracks and held her breath. _What is he trying to say?_ She turned to him.  
"Why I am surprised with you Obi-wan Kenobi. Are you saying that you doubt the teachings of the council?" He said nothing and looked away from her.  
_**But you'll just sit tight  
And watch it unwind  
It's only what you're asking for**  
_  
Trinity walked off toward her room. I_sn't it bad enough that I am thinking these things, let alone Obi starting to as well? Who am I to doubt the council? They have to be right. I was wrong, oh so wrong… We can't change our destiny. I know his and I know my own. It's to be Jedi knights, great Jedi knights… alone._ She continued walking, lost in her thoughts, and almost running right into Qui-Gon.  
"Ah, Trinity, I wanted to speak with you." Trinity looked up, a bit startled at the voice.  
"Yes Master?" He smiled kindly at her.  
"Obi-Wan and I are going to be going off on a mission. I am sorry but I have to leave you here." She nodded her head.  
"I understand." She started to walk off but stopped herself. "Is there any word on when Ki is returning?" Qui-Gon said nothing but instead started to walk away. Halfway to the door he stopped and turned back to her.  
"They are thinking of giving him a seat on the council." She sucked in a breath of air. "And Shea is with child." He walked out the door, it making a firm noise as it closed a very final tone.  
Trinity walked past the cafeteria, all thoughts of food wiped from her mind. _Alone. I am going to be alone again. Ki will be far too busy with the council… There is no emotion; there is peace. There is no ignorance; there is knowledge. There is no passion; there is serenity. There is no death; there is the force._ She continued walking, not fully watching were she was going. _There is no emotion; there is peace. There is no ignorance; there is knowledge. There is no passion; there is serenity. There is no death; there is the force._ She ended up at her own room. Looking a bit shocked she typed in the code to enter.  
"I knew you would be here. I heard Qui-Gon talking to you." Trinity was silent. Walking over to her table she took a green apple out of a bowl and took a bite out of it, making a snapping crunch.  
"All the way to Kessel." He looked at her, but she was looking at the ground. "I will miss you while we are away. I wish you could come with us." She looked up, a bright smile on her face.  
"You'll be fine, I know you will. Trust me, I know these things." He started toward her, but she stood up and walked toward her bathroom. "Please Obi, you have much to get ready before you may leave." She turned and looked at him from the door way. "Ki will be here soon, don't worry about me." He knew she was lying, but let her have her way.  
"We leave tonight Trin…" he turned toward the door. "Good bye Trinity Thorn." She turned around quickly and looked at him seriously.  
"Don't say good bye. You only say good bye when you don't mean to return. Instead say 'Until I return.'" Her eyes looked almost wet, but he thought that it might have been the lighting.  
"Until I return."  
_**And you'll be just fine  
With all of your time  
It's only what you're waiting for  
**  
_Trinity stood in her shower, the warm water running down her body. Hot salty tears mingled with the water running down her face. _What is wrong with me? This isn't me! I would never feel this way. I feel so…lost_. She closed her eyes while a sob escaped her throat. _What is this? What could be wrong? What am I feeling?_ Images of Obi-Wan flashed in her mind; him smiling, him laughing, him in pain, him crying, him serious, him sleeping. _Do I… love him?  
**Out of the island  
Into the highway**  
_Trinity walked out of the shower and braided her hair carefully into a long plait down her back. She struggled into her clothes, pulled up her boots, and fasted her belt. She finally walked out the door, only grabbing her light saber. The corridors of the dorm rooms were empty; nearly all of the students were in class. She continued walking, and found herself outside of Obi-Wan's room. Trinity looked at the door, thinking hard. _I need him. I need to tell him… maybe he will understand… understand to stay away…_She raised her hand to knock, but lowered it. _No one needs to know. Not even him._ She continued on toward the training area.  
_**Past the places were you might have turned  
You never did notice  
That you still hide away  
The anger of angels who won't return**  
__There is no…  
__**He is everything you want  
He is everything you need  
He is everything inside of you  
That you wish you could be**  
__There is no…  
__**He says all the right things  
At exactly the right times  
But he means nothing to you  
And you don't know why**  
__There is no love…  
_Obi wan watched her walk away from his door, his hand raised as of to stop her from walking away.  
_**"I am everything you want  
I am everything you need  
I am everything inside of you  
That you wish you could be  
I say all the right things  
At exactly the right times  
But I mean nothing to you  
And I don't know why  
Why  
I don't know…"**  
There is no Love; there is Suppression_

_

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_

I have to admit, I love the character Obi-Wan-Kenobi. now this is more of a note to you Stawars fans. I know, I know, Obi isn't really like that, but this is a "What-if..." type of thing. maybe he would act that way with his childhood bestfriend. Trinity Thorn isn't a real character I made her up. I alwasy though that Obi wasn't the type to not fall in love and grow old with someone. I think deep down inside he wished that he could fall in love. So anyway the long and the short of it i made up Trin. I have RPed with her before, and i have writen storys about them as well. So now to this story. I heard this song a few years ago when it came out and fell in love with it, but as time went on i forgot all about it until i downloaded a Music Video called "The Rinoa and Squall Tribute" it was beautiful, and it was set to this song. for some reason it hit me as a perfect song for Trinity about Obi-Wan. When I started writing it i had that in mind, but then about halfway through it i thought that maybe it would be better if it were a song that Obi had wrought about her. As you can see i stuck with my first thought. I think I should also point out that the line that is Repeated through out the whole story, "There is no emotion; there is peace. There is no ignorance; there is knowledge. There is no passion; there is serenity. There is no death; there is the force." is really from Starwars, it's a phrase that Jedi's in training have to memorise. I found it odd that it said nothing about love, so I made the last line up. I felt it fit, for Obi and Trin, and even for Anakin and Padime. So there you have it! I hope you enjoyed it, and thank you for reading!


End file.
